Snow and Ache

Snow: I like that you chose this topic because writing about the seasons or the elements gives you a lot of room for description and interpretation. This reminds me a little of the poem I submitted for my workshop, except you have all but negative things to say about the snow. I like the line "Getting lost in a sea of blankets of flesh" this gave me a warm visual in my mind, quite a contrast to the coldness of the snow. I feel that you could add a little more description. There are some good images you have presented like when you compare the softness to an angels wing, but I feel that you could go a little more in depth. Your poem is fairly short (I don't mind, so are all of mine!) but I feel that you could really elaborate more because the snow is symbolic of so many things and many comparisons and metaphors can be made.

Ache: I think that anyone that has ever experienced loss can really relate to this poem. It's hard to move on or think of anything else when you are so consumed by a memory and trying to cope with the loss. I like the repetition of the first line of each stanza, I think you did this intentionally just to reiterate your feelings. I like the line "it brings me to my knees" because pain can really do that to you. When something so devastating happens it can really break a person's spirit and bring them down. Like I had mentioned about your previous poem, I think you could elaborate more. Pain is so strong that you could add a lot more depth and detail to create images that stick with the reader.